basically, to be my boyfriend you need a dirty mind.
How do people end up in relationship after relationship after relationship and I can’t find a single person to even find me remotely interesting for a solid ten seconds?
Whenever I hear people say that classical music is boring I just want to remind them that Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture called for a cannon to be fired a total of 16 times.
remove cattle from stage
that’s not even the best partkey terms include:
- “balance your chair on two legs”
- "continue swimming motion"
- "insert peanuts"
- "play ball!"
- "release the penguins"
- "gradually become agitated"
- "light explosives now….. and….. ….. now."
begin turning flame slightly higher and higher
opt. shoe horn
rests are imaginary
I’m stuck between wanting:
1. A long lasting relationship with my soulmate who supports me and protects me and is my partner and we are completely bad ass together and in love
2. Wanting to have casual sex and rip out the heart of everyone person I meet
3. Being independent and having a loyal dog while I’m married to my career